Mmmmmm… Burger.

[Edited for tone]
The most unforgiveable thing about Sandy Berger stuffing classified documents into his socks and pants and walking off with them prior to the 9/11 Commission staff getting hold of them, is that he’s apparently revitalized the careers of Clinton mouthpieces like Joe Lockhart, Lanny Davis and the walking human slander who goes by the name of Chris Lehane. Berger’s lawyer – Clintonoid Lanny Breuer – admitted that some of the theft of classified docs was “knowing” and some was inadvertant. “Knowing”, by the way, is a culpable mental state in federal law. It’s the mens rea that gets you prison time; it means it wasn’t an accident. It’s the difference between murder and negligent homicide; felony fraud and a bookkeeping mistake. “Knowing” is a big deal.
Meanwhile, Chris Lehane is saying it’s lies all lies, a conservative plot, all Republicans care about is what Dems have in their pants, and so forth.
Damn these crooked Clintonites. How I wish they’d return to their holes.

Cripes. I can look back in time and I know that while Clinton wasn’t much of a president, he wasn’t evil incarnate. But these toadies and lickspittles and attack dogs and gollum-like scumbag hangers-on around him… I can’t stand Clinton because of his one truly unforgiveable crime: he foisted these lying, spin-doctoring jerks on the American public, and apparently we’re going to be stuck with them, yes they are going to be the face of the Democratic Party, for the next 30 years. They are scummy, odious and dishonest down to their toes. Where’s Jim Carville? I’m sure he’s got some yarn to spin about how it’s the evil ol’ Pullikins pickin’ on ol Sandy boy. And you just wait until Joe Conason gets his lips off President Clinton’s ass, realizes what’s going on, and goes into full attack dog mode. It’ll make Lehane look like a pussy. These calculating liars thrust us into political partisanship hell with their defense of the profligate presidential penis; they are returning us to that political hell at broadband speed this week.
Lehane’s and Lockhart’s talking points, by the way, are that the stolen top secret documents and contemporaneous notes (that are now lost, which dealt with the Clintonite opportunities to take out Al Qaida, by the way) were taken out of the National Archives top secret holding area due to “sloppiness.” You see, Mr. Berger, former National Security Advisor, is just a sloppy guy, and if he didn’t have his staff with him to look after this type of thing, it’s perfectly natural that he would have wandered out with documents up his shirt, down his pants, in his socks (all places he admitted to hiding the docs) and up his wazoo, for all we know. You know, it’s funny; I worked with a lot of highly classified docs, deep in windowless vaults for a few years. It’s hard to get out with any documents intentionally, much less to inadvertantly walk out with anything down your pants, up your shirt, and in your socks. Had I walked out with a bunch of materials and been caught, my sore white ass would be in Leavenworth right now. Berger not only isn’t going to head to Leavenworth; he’s going to wind up a Democrat hero. I don’t have the nerve to check out the usual lefty hangouts; I’m sure they are in full war room mode.
Just for the sake of argument, assuming the truth of Lehane’s and Lockhart’s blatant lie – it’s blatant because Berger’s lawyer already admitted that it wasn’t mere sloppiness – assuming the truth of it, then what does that say about Mr. Berger’s fitness to be a National Security Advisor, that he can’t even follow basic security procedures? Doesn’t this strike you as the kind of guy who just might lose track of a couple terrorist groups, now and again, when there are other pressing issues like irritable Kosovars and dogs being wagged by the tail?
And what does it say about Bill Clinton, and now John Kerry, who employed such a mindless numbnuts like Berger in senior foreign policy advisory roles?
Yep, vote Kerry in 2004. He’ll get rid of those dishonest dummies like Bush and Rice and the obfuscating Rumsfeld, and bring in some honest smart folks like Sandy Berger, Joe Wilson and Chris Lehane.
And you know what my sinking gut feeling on this whole thing is? That Berger came across some working papers, or some notes, or some drafts, that showed exactly how lightly the Clinton Administration took the bin Laden threat. Yep, it was a coverup. I’m sure of it. No other explanation makes sense. And even the coverup doesn’t make sense. The country has clearly been in a forgiving mood, knowing full well that we are barely putting up with a pre-emptive war right now, and we sure wouldn’t have in 1998. But along comes a Clintonoid (it’s all about the Legacy, stooopid…) to once again prove, the coverup is always worse than the crime.
I don’t know that for sure. The only thing I do know for sure, is that this being a Clintonoid coverup, by the end of this scandal, the Republicans will be the villains, the FBI agents will be in civil court defending their actions, and Sandy Berger – who told Brother Bill to forget about picking up bin Laden from the Sudanese, too much trouble – will be the wronged party.
Damn these lying, soulless Clintonite mouthpieces. Damn them.



  1. Al Maviva

    Alan, very good one. As I work in D.C., I will be sure to pass that around. People here will definitely get it – even the libs will prolly laugh at that one.
    By the way, are you as offended as I am, at how stupid the Clintonoid spinners think we all are? As Berger’s lawyer is telling the whole world “yep, he did it, and some of the theft was knowing” (an admission of a culpable criminal mens rea) – spin doctor Lanny Davis is telling the world “he was innocent. It was an accident. It’s all a Republican hit job.”
    The juxtaposition of the two quotes on Tim Blair’s site really makes it hit home, and in a tiny nutshell, it’s why I despise the Clinton coterie so. They are reminiscent of the cheating husband whose wife catches him in the marital bed, in the act, with the neighbor’s teenage daughter. The wife cries out, “how can you cheat on me?” Between grunts and moans of pleasure, he answers back, as he thrusts away, “Honey, I’m not cheating on you. Who are you going to believe, me, or your lying eyes?
    The only one I respect out of that whole Clinton crowd is Hillary; I generally disagree with her positions, but she is pretty blunt, and being a truth teller among a crowd of dedicated prevaricators probably takes a little guts.

  2. Sam

    Go ahead and trust Hillary if you want, but not with your paycheck. She admitted she’d like to take those tax cuts away from us and use them “for the common good”.
    If Berger doesn’t go to trial for theft of classified documents, that’s just sad. The guy admits he stole those papers, so it should be entered into court records as his confession and his guilty plea.

  3. Mike

    Sam: Trust Hillary? Certainly. She is very refreshing. She doesn’t quibble over things, she says it flat out. Kind of neat when a political enemy says “Of course I’m going to smash you! What did you think I was, your mommy or something?”
    Like and accept what she would do? Not. Trust her to be herself? Absolutely!
    Ah, Politics! My favorite blood-sport!

  4. Major Sean Bannion

    “…. Had I walked out with a bunch of materials and been caught, my sore white ass would be in Leavenworth right now.”
    Yes, Al, but your ass would be sore BECAUSE you were in Leavenworth. You got that whole post hoc ergo propter hoc thing fouled up.
    “…then what does that say about Mr. Berger’s fitness to be a National Security Advisor, that he can’t even follow basic security procedures?”
    It says he is far more of an idiot than Dems think GW is. Who’s misunderestimatin’ who now?
    “And what does it say about Bill Clinton, and now John Kerry, who employed such a mindless numbnuts like Berger in senior foreign policy advisory roles?”
    It says John Kerry is unqualified to be president because he lacks even the one quality which must be present in order to cover up for a lack of seriousness or a lack of credentials — the brains to be smart enough to pick people who have both.
    Hang tough, Al. You’re still doing God’s work.