Random Antipodean Notes, part 3

*Australia Post does not deliver on Saturdays. This is sacreligious and uncivilized. Also, one can’t leave outgoing mail in the mailbox for the “postie” to pick up as he drops off your mail. One must actually schlep to the post office, every time.
*Today I went looking for tortillas in the supermarket. They were in the “Asian Foods” section. Sigh.
*I do not and have never had an uncle named Bob. Why does everyone keep insisting that I do?
*Due to the high price of imported goods, designer perfumes are quite expensive: usually between AU$80-120 per bottle (that’s US$60-90, at least 20% higher than the US price.) In the enterprising Aussie spirit, there is a quite highly developed fake fragrance industry. One can pick up a fake Dior, Gucci or St. Laurent in a plain-jane bottle for AU$5-10, and the quality is better than similar products in the US.
*People here laugh at me when I use the word “soda” to describe a sweet fizzy drink, “candy” to describe solid sweets, and “ketchup” for the red stuff you put on hamburgers. It’s Coke, lollies and tomato sauce.
*Much like the thought of Vegemite toast makes me cringe, the mention of that American childhood staple, the peanut-butter-and-jelly-sandwich, seems to turn most Aussie stomachs. Understandable at first when I realized that “jelly” is actually the American “Jello”, but even a peanut-butter-and-jam-sandwich seems to disgust. I’m not sure why this is so.



  1. Bud

    but the lamb is VERY tasty and much less expensive
    there are heaps of beaches within 20 mins of most cbds
    the belgian beer cafe in cammeray is a deelite

  2. James

    And if you’ve ever feasted on a Papaya King hot dog, don’t EVER ask for a hot dog in Australia!

  3. Dave J

    Of course, there are also parts of the American South that generically describe any soda as a “Coke.”
    Ketchup is tomato sauce? Then what do they call actual tomato sauce? That’s no weirder, however, than that what other Americans call marinara sauce (i.e., tomato-based pasta sauce without meat) is known in New Orleans as “red gravy.” Another one of the infinite series of little things that give that city its unique character…another lagniappe, if you will. 😉

  4. Dr. Weevil

    It’s not just Australia that doesn’t get PBJs. Years ago I read something by William F. Buckley about calling room service in a Brazilian hotel to order one. As I recall, they asked him “and who old is your little boy”, and he answered “56” (or something around that).

  5. Dr. Weevil

    Sorry: “and HOW old is your little boy?” It’s been a long day. I spent 6 hours in New York (mostly to see Das Rheingold at the Met) and 7 hours getting there and back.

  6. Al Maviva

    Oh, dear God, Dr. Weevil. You poor suffering bastard.
    Did the court you see Das Rheingold as part of your community service?
    I’m just joking. I adore Wagner, and find most of his work absolutely hypnotic. However, it’s also exhausting; after three or four hours, that same hypnotic quality puts me into a sleepy trance, and renders me utterly incapable of travel.

  7. Alan E Brain

    Re : Sweets/Lollies : Kool Mints, Jaffas, Fantales, Minties… When I was in Germany, I used to get CARE packages of Minties.
    Pavlovas ( with Passionfruit Topping).
    Steak Sangers.